Sep 08, 2022
You’re in your kitchen or, better yet, outdoors standing over a hot grill with glowing red coals. If you’re a dad, you’ve got a ridiculous, cheesy apron over your cargo shorts that says something you think is clever.. If you’re not a dad, you want to burn that stupid apron... and maybe those shorts. You’ve got your thick as hell, marbled, fatty, bone-in ribeye at room temperature, salted, and ready to make sweet love to that cast iron or, better yet, open flame. But first you’ve got to lube your equipment lest you find that steak sticking like Siamese twins. It doesn't matter what you use: Butter, lard, tallow, suet, so long as you don’t use those industrial machine lubricants masquerading as food.
Seed oils… Sunflower oil, canola oil, safflower oil, grape seed oil, rapeseed oil (that name itself is decidedly problematic), and a growing list of other oils from any number of seeds that are deemed “heart healthy” by whatever politically driven, pharmaceutical industry/big food funded organization is selling you rubbish "nutrition" advice this week… These oils were once exclusively used as machine lube. Then someone figured out they won't immediately kill you if you eat them and they could mark up the price significantly if they called it food. Don't believe Us? Google search "machine lubricant" and click "images." The very first option on top to narrow your search is "food grade." Hmmm... These oils are deadly toxic and making you fat, depressed, ugly, sexless, and ultimately... dead. That is not hyperbole.
These rancid oils that come from burned seeds have no redeeming qualities unless you own stock in Big Food or Big Pharma, in which case you’re gunning for billionaire status.
How are they making you fat? They contain generous quantities of phytoestrogens and linoleic acids that create hormone imbalances you can’t exercise away or run from on a treadmill. Say goodbye to the 6-pack and hello to a keg. How many big-bellied diabetics do you know who have back problems that are a result of their obvious front problems? You can be almost certain their diet is rich in industrial lube.
How are they making you depressed? Those same phytoestrogens that cause hormone imbalances are affecting the chemical balance of dopamine, serotonin, and sex hormones, making you an emotional, anxious wreck akin to a 13 year old girl going through puberty and her first breakup simultaneously. We know a natural bodybuilder named Frank who cried when Kelly Clarkson beat that other guy on American Idol. True story. The only fat he had in his diet was seed-oil cooking spray and the canola oil (which is a high-standard, fancy version of rapeseed oil) he spritzed on his salad. Frank was a mess. He also had acne all over his back and chest because seed oils make you ugly. Seriously.
How are they making you ugly? The linoleic acid in these seed oils damages your skin from the inside out. The skin is not only a giant endocrine organ responsible for defense against all sorts of environmental factors, it’s also your outer layer that presents to the world. Linoleic acid can aid in the development of eczema, psoriasis, acne, and studies are even showing it to be a contributor to skin cancer, especially in combination with topicals like lotions, sunscreens, and perfumes, many of which contain linoleic acid. Skin damaged by linoleic acid is far more susceptible to sun damage. Vicious cycle indeed.
How are seed oils making you sexless? Say it slowly: PHYTOESTROGENS. Nuff said.
How are seed oils killing you? You still don't know? Read everything you just read... again. For guidance as to what a proper nose-to-tail diet looks like, email us at firstname.lastname@example.org.